Is there such a thing as soul mates, a couple destined to be together for eternity? And how does one go about finding one's soul mate? In New Age thought, there is much discussion on soul mates, which are also commonly called "twin flames." There are many curious people who want to know who ask this question. And there are a lot of people who give very strange answers. I took a look at those who say they have the answer: one was a psychic, another an astrologer, another a channeler, and they all talk so certain on these matters. Yet when one closely examines their teachings, they are in reality guessing themselves, or basing it on their own intuitions. I was going to quote from them but their speeches quickly dive into the deep end, which is too bad, as some have interesting viewpoints.
So are there soul mates, or twin flames? The short answer is yes, there are true eternal soul mates. Despite what others may have said on this, this phrase "twin flame" is not completely accurate. More accurately, the male is the light of the flame of the female, and the female is the flame of the light of the male. They cannot exist without each other, but together they make one. Separate them, the flame will go out as if it had lost its oxygen. But together they will burn brightly if united in soul, mind and body.
As explained in The Divine Origin of Marriage Love and Sex, males are forms of intellect, and females are forms of volition or the will. Each individual person has these two aspects inside of them as the thought and the will. This two-fold division originates from the Divine Love and Divine Wisdom, the two primary aspects of God. Love seeks its truth and truth seeks its love, and together they make one in the act. This is the hidden spiritual origin of the love of the other sex, for sex is the physical manifestation of this spiritual reality.
ETERNAL CONJUNCTION OF SOUL MATES
The revelations given to Emanuel Swedenborg in the 18th century go much further than explaining the spiritual difference between the male and female, and provide a definite answer to the existence of eternal soul mates in heaven. The following points were given in these heavenly visions:
1. The soul is created upon conception. Memories of past lives originate from shared spiritual memory.In his 27 years of visions of heaven and hell, Swedenborg saw many things concerning angels, and one of them was that the higher angels would choose a soul mate with whom they would dwell with to eternity. The male and female would become so closely conjoined, together they would form one angel, the male and female becoming the intellect and will of the angel respectively:
2. Man has an internal body and an external body. The internal body lives after death.
3. Each soul is born as male or female, and will remain male or female to eternity.
4. Each individual person is highly valued, for each person is a microcosm of the universe, and God's plan is to have each person grow in happiness to eternity.
"Marriage in heaven is the conjunction of two into one mind. What this conjunction is shall be first explained. The mind consists of two parts, the one of which is called the understanding and the other the will. When these two parts make one, then they are called one mind. The husband then makes the part which is called the understanding, and the wife that which is called the will. When this conjunction, which is of the interiors, comes lower down into what is of their body, it is then perceived and felt as love, and this love is marriage love. From which it is plain that marriage love has its origin from the conjunction of two into one mind. This is called in heaven living together, and it is said that they are not two, but one, and so two consorts in heaven are not called two, but one angel." (Heaven and Hell, n. 367)
An angel of the third heaven told Swedenborg this:
"With us in the heavens, especially in the third heaven, our heavenly delights are chiefly from marriage love." (Angelic Wisdom concerning Marriage Love, n. 42)
Then, from Divine permission, Swedenborg was allowed to see a married angelic pair descend so that he could see them:
"And lo! a chariot then appeared descending from the highest or third heaven, in which an angel was seen; but as it approached two were seen in it. In the distance the chariot glittered like a diamond before my eyes. And young horses were harnessed to it, white as snow; and they who sat in the chariot held two turtle doves in their hands. ...And they said:—"We are a married pair. From the earliest age, called by you the golden age, we have lived happily in heaven; and always in the same flower of youth in which you see us today."
I observed them both attentively, for I perceived that they represented marriage love, in its life, and in its adornment; in its life in their faces, and in its adornment in their apparel. For all angels are affections of love in human form; their ruling affection itself shines forth from their faces. And from their affection and in harmony with it their garments are chosen. It is therefore said in heaven that his own affection clothes every one. The husband appeared to be at the age between manhood and youth. From his eyes beamed forth a light sparkling with the wisdom of love. His countenance was as if radiant from this light within, and by the irradiation from it the skin outwardly was as it were refulgent. Thence his whole face was one resplendent comeliness. He was clothed in a long robe that reached to the ankles, and under the robe a vestment of blue, and this was girded about with a golden girdle on which were three precious stones—two sapphires at the sides and in the middle a carbuncle. His stockings were of shining linen interwoven with threads of silver; and his shoes were entirely of silk. This was the representative form of marriage love with the husband.
And with the wife it was this:—I saw her face—and did not see it. I saw it as beauty itself, and did not see it because it was transcendent. For there was a splendour of flaming light in her countenance—such light as is with the angels of the third heaven—and it dimmed my sight, so that I was simply struck with amazement. Observing this she spoke to me saying:—And this is why it is more accurate to speak of a twin pair of flame and light, rather than twin flames, for the woman is the fire of love of wisdom in the man, and the man is the light of the woman's love. After marriage, this becomes inverted, internally man grows in his love, and the woman internally in her truth, for they each draw from the other part into each other.
"What do you see?"
I answered:—"I see only marriage love and a form of it. But I see—and do not see."
At this she turned herself partly away from her husband, and then I could regard her more intently. Her eyes glistened with the light of their heaven—which as was said is flaming, and for the reason that it is derived from the love of wisdom. For in that heaven wives love their husbands from wisdom and in their wisdom; and husbands love their wives from and in that love towards themselves—and they are thus united. Hence her beauty!—which in its form was such as no painter could emulate and portray; for there is no such lustre in his colour, nor any such beauty expressible by his art. Her hair was gracefully arranged in correspondence with her beauty, and had flowers inserted in it like a coronet. She wore a necklace of carbuncles, and pendent from this a rosary of chrysolites; and she had bracelets of pearls. She was arrayed in a flowing robe of scarlet, and under this had a waistcoat of purple, clasped in front with rubies. But, which was a marvel to me, the colours varied according to her aspect towards her husband, and according to this they were now more now less brilliant—more when they were mutually turned towards each other, and less when they were partly turned from each other." (Angelic Wisdom concerning Marriage Love, n. 42)
HOW TO FIND OR RECOGNIZE A SOUL MATE?
First, it should be known that the Divine Love and Divine Wisdom flows into everything. There can be no love without its truth, and no truth without its love. They will always work together to become one:
"Every affection has its mate as a partner; an affection of natural love has knowledge, an affection of spiritual love has intelligence, and an affection of heavenly love, wisdom; for affection without its mate as a partner is not any thing; for it is as esse [to be] without existere [to exist] and as substance without form, of which nothing can be predicated. Hence, within every created thing there is something which may be referred to the marriage of good and truth." (Angelic Wisdom concerning Divine Providence, n. 42)Every form of love and truth has its own specific partner:
"There is no love without its partner, which is knowledge, intelligence, and wisdom. The partner of natural love is knowledge, of spiritual love is intelligence, and of celestial love is wisdom." (Apocalypse Revealed, n. 351)
As this law is universal, as a corollary one can conclude that married pairs will be born who are destined to eventually find each other, for those who desire it. And if one does not find it while on earth, one will find one in heaven. The following passage I found very interesting, as Swedenborg talks about this very briefly:
"That for those who desire true marriage love the Lord provides similitudes; and if they are not given on earth He provides them in the heavens.—The reason is that all marriages of true marriage love are provided by the Lord. ...And how they are provided in the heavens I have heard described by the angels, thus:—That the Divine Providence of the Lord concerning marriages and in marriages is most particular and most universal; because all the delights of heaven stream forth from the delights of marriage love, as sweet waters from the flow of a fountain. And therefore it is provided that marriage pairs be born, and that they be educated for their marriages immediately under the Lord's auspices—the boy and the girl not knowing it. And after the requisite time, she, the marriageable virgin, and he, the youth then ripe for marriage, somewhere meet as if by chance, see each other, and then instantly, as from a certain instinct, they know that they are mates, and as if from a kind of inward dictate they think within them, the youth, "She is mine," and the virgin, "He is mine." And after this thought has been seated for some time in the mind of each they deliberately speak, and betroth themselves. It is said, as if by chance, instinct, and dictate, though the meaning is, of the Divine Providence—because so long as it is unknown it thus appears; for the Lord opens their internal similitudes so that they may see each other." (Angelic Wisdom concerning Marriage Love, n. 229)So finding a soul mate will happen as if by chance, but there is no such thing as chance. What we now call as "chance" or "accident" or "luck" all have a single cause, and that is Divine providence. Randomness is a modern invention to those who wish to have a world without a purpose. That it will seem to happen by chance, is shown from scripture when Abraham commanded his servant to find a wife for his son, and the servant finds Rebekah in a different land as if by chance.
From experience, those who have found their soul mate know immediately know within, and they will recognize each other by their face. One sign of a soul mate, is that the love will continually grow:
"With those who are in true marriage love the happiness of dwelling together increases; but with those who are not in marriage love it decreases.—The reason why the happiness of dwelling together increases with those who are in true marriage love is that they love each other mutually with every sense." (Angelic Wisdom concerning Marriage Love, n. 213)
And by grow, by that I mean they accept each other for who they are and not be judgmental, and on the other side of the coin, they learn to accept their faults and not deny them. For none of us are angels, we are in an eternal journey to become one. It is an angelic characteristic to see what is good in the other person:
"Those who are in charity scarcely see another's evil, but observe all that is good and true in him, and put a good interpretation on what is evil and false. Of such disposition are all angels, which they have from the Lord, Who bends all evil to good." (Heavenly Arcana, n. 1079)